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05 June 2015 @ 03:34 pm
Meme (Crack Crossovers Time, Part Six [in french] )  
Yup. awanderingbard and I probably have a problem but what are you gonna do?

Sixth time's the charm:
1. Natasha Romanov (MCU)
2. Beverly Katz (Hannibal)
3. John Watson (Sherlock)
4. Joan Watson (Elementary)
5. Jack Harkness (Torchwood)
6. Maria Stark (MCU)
7. James Bond (Skyfall)
8. Bucky Barnes (MCU)
9. Cecil Palmer (Welcome to Night Vale)
10. Angie Martinelli (MCU)

1.) [3] (John Watson) is in need of advice from [5] (Jack Harkness), what is it?

Most likely related to a case of Sherlock's that's coinciding with a Torchwood case. The suspect John and Sherlock were chasing fell to his death but his blood is blue. What's that about? That's not medically possible!

2.) [1] (Natasha Romanov), [2] (Beverly Katz), and [6] (Maria Stark) all have a crush on [4] (Joan Watson).

You know what? I can see all three of these pairings. I mean, Joan is really easy to crush on. Natasha might actively flirt with her. Beverly might want to at least go on a date with her. Maria would tell Howard that his biggest competition is not Augustin from her lab but Joan because she rocks. Howard would probably encourage Maria to take her out.

Howard: Hey, my birthday's coming up. Maybe the three of us can-
Maria: Don't ruin this for me, Howard.

3.) [8] (Bucky Barnes) is working as a waiter/waitress and just spilt coffee over [2] (Beverly Katz).

Beverly would probably use the opportunity of Bucky apologizing and trying to help clean up by asking him rather invasive questions about his metal arm. "Can you feel temperature? Pressure? Where does it connect to the rest of you?" After Bucky just grimly apologizes again and doesn't answer her questions, Beverly would probably come back on a different day to apologize for being a little rude.

4.) [10] (Angie Martinelli) accidentally sent an e-mail to [7] (James Bond) saying their inner darkest secret.

Seriously, meme?!

Angie would be mortified and probably try to avoid Bond, which he'd collude with for a bit thinking that's really what Angie wants which would probably make Angie feel even worse for awhile. But then Fate would inevitably make it so that the two run into each other and Angie would ask him about it head on because she wants to rip it off like a band aid. Bond would tell her everyone has secrets and everyone is entitled live their lives without that secret constantly pushing them down.

Angie: So we're okay about the email?
Bond: What email?
Angie: *beams*

5.) [9] (Cecil Palmer) is throwing a party and only invites odd numbers (Natasha Romanov, John Watson, Jack Harkness, James Bond). How does the party turn out?

Natasha, John, Jack, and Bond would probably spend most of the party being incredibly confused. Why is wheat not allowed? No one is concerned about that 5 headed dragon? Who is this mysterious disembodied voice that keeps talking to them? Does anyone else see all those angels around that old lady? Natasha would want to peace out after 10 minutes as well as Bond. Jack would be more game and probably hit on Hiram McDaniels, the literal 5 headed dragon.

6.) [4] (Joan Watson) is locked in a closet with [6] (Maria Stark) at a party, what happens?

Clearly both Joan and Maria were knocked out and put in there for different reasons. Maria for a kidnapping/ransom situation and Joan because she was investigating this. Joan would use her lock picking skills and get them out very quickly though.

7.) [2] (Beverly Katzh) just caught [3] (John Watson) stealing cookies from the cookie jar.

Beverly would only care if John was taking the last oatmeal raisin. If not, she'd stick her hand right in to grab a few after him.

8.) [8] (Bucky Barnes) cranked up the music really loud at night and woke up [9] (Cecil Palmer). What music is it and what happens next?

Bucky would apologize and explain he sometimes does this when he doesn't want to sleep because of nightmares. Cecil would totally get that and say he also likes to listen to the weather at night. Cecil would then probably offer to read him the Community Calendar as he's been told it instills fear in people when they're awake so you get it out of your system before you sleep. Makes sense, right?

9.) [7] (James Bond) and [1] (Natasha Romanov) are both at the bus stop together and it’s raining. What kind of conversation would they start?

They're probably both on their way to a joint mission that probably features henchmen, death traps, and 89% chance of death. Natasha would make a comment that it's probably a Wednesday. Bond would reply that at least the weather's nice.

10.) [10] (Angie Martinelli) is hitchhiking by a road until [5] (Jack Harkness) accompanied with [1] (Natasha Romanov) drive by, will they pick him/her up, or will 10 steal their car and leave them stranded instead?

Jack and Natasha would totally pick her up. They might have to shift around some stuff in the back seat so Angie doesn't see the dead alien corpse they've got there but they'd pick her up and chat about completely normal, everyday things like the weather before dropping her off. Fury and Ianto would both raise an eyebrow at Jack and Natasha picking up a civilian when they had a dead alien in their car but Natasha would say with a slight smirk while looking pointedly at Steve that it isn't polite to leave a defenseless girl stranded in the middle of the night. Steve would agree. Missions are important but so are people's safety.

11.) [9] (Cecil Palmer), [7] (James Bond), and [4] (Joan Watson) all run into each other after coming out from the same romance movie at the movie theater, what are their reactions?

Only Cecil was there to watch the movie. Bond was there on a mission and Joan was there on a case. Joan would probably be observing that there's something off about Bond, he's clearly military and trained to kill and very suspicious. Bond would be wondering if Joan is involved with his mission somehow. A trained assassin? Cecil would be nattering on about how Helen Hunt is his favorite actress.

12.) [5] (Jack Harkness) and [10] (Angie Martinelli) are forced to sing a duet song at karaoke. What is their reaction and are they at all good?

They would both absolutely kill this. Angie with her acting background and Jack being Jack, they'd wow the audience with impressive vocals and enthusiastic dance moves.

13.) [6] (Maria Stark) and [8] (Bucky Barnes) have the same ticket for a seat at a football game, what do they do about it and who gets the seat?

Bucky would offer the seat to Maria right away. His parents raised him to be polite. Maria would insist he take the seat as it gives her the perfect excuse to leave. She's only hear because she promised Howard if he had to sit through an opera, she'd have to sit through a football game. But there was a mix up with the tickets so it's not her fault and Bucky can take her seat.

14.) [3] (John Watson) gets to choose anyone from 1 to 10 to dance with at the prom, who would it be and what would their and everyone else’s reaction be?

John would pick Joan because they'd have lots to talk about during their dance. And she's a pretty lady. Joan would accept and they would spend most of the time laughing about how impressive but bizarre Sherlocks.

15.) Everyone is celebrating New Year’s Eve, what are they all doing?
Maria is probably hosting it at the Stark mansion. Everyone would be having a great time because Maria is a great host. Angie and Bond would be flirting outrageously while having a slow dance and totally share a kiss at midnight. Joan and Bucky would be having a nice conversation about how well Winnie is doing in school, although Joan would tell Bucky to calm down a little about that boy in Winnie's class that likes her. Natasha would chime in with a smile that it's the boy's parents who should be worried about Winnie.
The Writer They Call Tayawanderingbard on June 5th, 2015 10:21 pm (UTC)
Angie: So we're okay about the email?
Bond: What email?
Angie: *beams*

Aww, they are such an oddly cute pairing.

Natasha would say with a slight smirk while looking pointedly at Steve that it isn't polite to leave a defenseless girl stranded in the middle of the night. Steve would agree. Missions are important but so are people's safety.

I can hear JJ echoing this lesson to Winnie when their 'missions' get a little too dangerous as children.

Winnie: But we have to solve the crime!
JJ: Not if you get hurt. That would be bad.
Winnie: Missions are important!
JJ: So are are people's safety, Winnie.

formerly lifeinsomniacjoonscribble on June 5th, 2015 10:27 pm (UTC)
Winnie: Where was this safety attitude last week when you tried to take out that 5th grader twice your size for pushing Bonnie?
JJ: Um...
Bucky: Yeah, Steve. Isn't safety important?
Steve: Um...
The Writer They Call Tayawanderingbard on June 5th, 2015 10:45 pm (UTC)

JJ: *matter-of-factly* Safety is important when it's other people, not when it's you.
Steve: *nods, before realizing* That's how I live my life, isn't it?
Nora: Yes, it is, Steve Rogers.
Bucky: Yeah, Steve Rogers, yes it is.
formerly lifeinsomniacjoonscribble on June 5th, 2015 11:11 pm (UTC)
It's the moment Bucky and Nora have been waiting for when Steve finally gets that his motto is not so smart.
The Writer They Call Tayawanderingbard on June 5th, 2015 11:22 pm (UTC)
But he totally can't change his viewpoint on that, so it doesn't really help much.

Steve: JJ, sometimes we have to look after ourselves instead of helping other people.
JJ: Really?
Steve: Yes.
JJ: Do you really think that?
Steve: Yes.
JJ: But are you just saying that because Mom said you had to?
Steve: No.
JJ: Are you lying?
Steve: ...Yes.
JJ: I knew it!
formerly lifeinsomniacjoonscribble on June 6th, 2015 12:21 am (UTC)
JJ: Do you really think that?
Steve: Yes.
JJ: But are you just saying that because Mom said you had to?
Steve: No.
JJ: Are you lying?
Steve: ...Yes.
JJ: I knew it!

I love how JJ wears Steve down with his questions. It's like at some point Steve knows he can't lie anymore.
The Writer They Call Tayawanderingbard on June 6th, 2015 12:31 am (UTC)
I think he learned it from Nora. I have a headcanon that at the beginning of their relationship, Steve's tendency to repress emotions and smooth things over meant she had to provoke him into fighting with her, by poking and prodding and asking questions until he lost his temper and they could hash out their problems. Steve had never been in a relationship before, and he didn't really know how to have a fight or that it was okay to say that he wanted her to put her dishes in the sink and she wouldn't say 'fuck you, Steve Rogers, I'm leaving you'. He got more comfortable expressing dissatisfaction as time went on.

Edited at 2015-06-06 12:31 am (UTC)